Saturday, August 25, 2012

Chapter 20: Logos

BACK AT THE BAXTER BUILDING...


INVISIBLE WOMAN: What's your idea, Watcher?  Tell us please, what can we do to save the Earth?


THE WATCHER: The Earth?  My dear Mrs. Richards, it is not only the Earth, but the very Universe itself, that is threatened by this latest peril.  You four as well as any know that my cosmic mandate is but to observe.  But the Monad threatens that objective; thus, I must intervene.



MR. FANTASTIC: No need to make excuses, Uatu.  You pretty much show up whenever you want anyway.  



THE WATCHER:  Look, Reed, I don't need to be here you know.  If you want to try and figure this crap out on your own, I'm perfectly happy to go back to--


HUMAN TORCH: --Now, now, Uatu, you know how Reed is.  Lacking in the social graces.  It's cool; just tell us how we can save the world.


THE THING: Matchstick's right fer once.  Plus, you know, you kinda do show up a lot.



THE WATCHER: Yeah, yeah.  I guess you're right.  Well, anyways, like I was saying, the Monad's not only the end, but the beginning.  There's only one guy who knows what it's like on both ends of this deal.  You know of whom I speak, Richards.  He was there at the the beginning of this Universe, and he may well be here at the end.  But if there is any way to save this Universe, he will know.  You must seek the counsel of...


THE WATCHER: ...GALACTUS!!!



MR. FANTASTIC: Whoa, whoa.  Are you kidding?  I mean, in a way, it makes perfect sense.  But Uatu, it's too dangerous.  By summoning Galactus to Earth, it would threaten--



THE WATCHER: --Oh, you will not need to summon him here, Reed Richards...


THE WATCHER: ...for Galactus is already on his way...


TO BE CONTINUED IN CHAPTER 21: MUTATION!!!

Saturday, August 18, 2012

Chapter 19: The Ballad of En Sabah Nur and Nathaniel Essex

AT THE HULKS' APARTMENT, MOLE MAN STARTS SPILLING THE BEANS...



MOLE MAN: So, like, thousands and thousands of years ago in ancient Egypt...


MOLE MAN: This creepy looking baby with grey skin and blue lips was found by a settler of Akkaba.


MOLE MAN: The kid looked so weird he was taken to Baal, an Egyptian warlord who lived according to the maxim of "survival of the fittest"...


MOLE MAN: Baal recognized the child's uniqueness and named him En Sabah Nur--"The First One." 


MOLE MAN: Baal sent the freakish child away so that it could mature in safety...


MOLE MAN: For hundreds of years, En Sabah Nur grew and was nurtured by Baal's teachings, and he too became obsessed with the notion of the strongest being those who would survive...


MOLE MAN: ...for En Sabah Nur was strong, he being the first known mutant among the human race...


MOLE MAN: ...though he eventually took the name...Apocalypse.


MOLE MAN: For thousands of years, Apocalypse has been bent on one thing...world domination.


MOLE MAN: During the late Nineteenth Century, Apocalypse found his greatest pupil...


MOLE MAN: Nathaniel Essex was a brilliant scientist and geneticist...


MOLE MAN: ...he was also a faithful student and ardent admirer of Charles Darwin.  Soon, Essex became obsessed with human evolution, and in particular, the role of...mutation.



MOLE MAN: Essex believed in accelerating the process of evolution by promoting mutation.



MOLE MAN: Essex's wife tried to dissuade him, begging him to consider the morality of his crusade.



MOLE MAN: She considered his motivations to be not only immoral, but completely...sinister.



MOLE MAN: Eventually, the ancient mutant Apocalypse sought Essex out, for he believed their goals to be aligned. 



MOLE MAN: Essex agreed to subject himself to Apocalypse's experiments.  In the process, however, Essex lost what little was left of his humanity and, as Apocalypse's mutant disciple, took for himself a new name...



MOLE MAN: ...the last word spoken to him by his heartbroken wife...


MOLE MAN: ...Sinister!  Apocalypse wanted Sinister to create a genetic plague that would mutate every human being on Earth...


MOLE MAN: But Sinister betrayed Apocalypse, and instead infected him with a technovirus that forced the ancient En Sabah Nur into a period of extended--but not permanent-- hibernation.


MOLE MAN: For well over a century, Mister Sinister has been obsessed with mutation and change.  With the Monad, he has created not just the pinnacle of human evolution.  It is the end, as well as the beginning, of existence as we know it.  More importantly for Sinister, it will be the final end of Apocalpse.


DEADPOOL: Maybe it's just because I'm a borderline schizophrenic, but that all makes perfect sense to me.


WOLVERINE: But doesn't Sinister know he'll be wiped out by the Monad, too?  And what about Dr. Doom?  How'd he get tangled up in this?

MOLE MAN: Sinister plans on traveling to a different time or different dimension or something; he'll save himself.  But as for Doom...


MOLE MAN: ...well, to be perfectly honest, Doom hasn't told me his plans.  All I know is, he wants the Monad for something, and he wants it desperately....

TO BE CONTINUED IN CHAPTER 20: LOGOS!!!



Chapter 18: Headshot

ON TOP OF THE HULKS' APARTMENT BUILDING, THE SPECIAL SECRET MUTANT TEAM, X-FORCE, PREPARES TO INFILTRATE...


WOLVERINE: Cyclops is right, we can't have the Avengers totally showing us up like that!



PSYLOCKE: For sure.  We've can't afford to screw this up. I've been focusing my psionic powers on the Hulks' apartment, but there is so much interference and all I can pick up is signals of extreme violence!



WOLVERINE: Extreme violence is our our specialty.  Wade, you go in first and check things out; the rest of us will follow.



DEADPOOL: Okay, sure.  You're sending me into the Hulks' apartment to meet up with Mole Man.  Now...just so I'm clear, who exactly is the bad guy?



WOLVERINE: Mole Man's bad guy numero uno, but watch out for Red Hulk because he can be quite a bastard, too.



DEADPOOL:  Got it.  Here I go...down, down, the goblin's down...



DEADPOOL: Fifteen birds...in five fir trees...their feathers were fanned...in a fiery breeze...gosh, from the sound of things, there's quite a slaughter going on in there.



DEADPOOL: But funny little birds...they had no wings! Oh what shall we do...with the funny little things?  Dude...it's sounding pretty violent in there.  Just--brutal.  Hope the Hulks are okay.



DEADPOOL: Hm.  Well, this is...uh...not exactly what I expected...


MOLE MAN: Oh, phooey! These Covenant are just awful!


GREY HULK: Hell yeah they are.  Now, here's another one, now--X button, X button, X button!


GREY HULK: Oooh!  Headshot!  Nice.  Now pick up his weapon.


DEADPOOL: Wow, that was a really nice headshot.


DEADPOOL: Wait...what was I here for?  



WOLVERINE: Hiiiiiihheeeeaaaayyyyyyyygh!



WOLVERINE: Okay, Mole Man, you leave the Hulks alone and--uh...wait, what's going on here?  What the hell, Wade?



GREY HULK: Hey, Wolverine!  It's all good.  We convinced Mole Man that Dr. Doom was going to double cross him so he called off the Mole Monster and we've just been chillaxin'.  Teaching him how to play Halo.



MOLE MAN:  Oooh, I can never pick up those frag grenades...

LATER...


WOLVERINE: Look, Mole Man, you're not in any trouble, but we need to know what Doom's up to.  Tell us everything you know.

MOLE MAN: Then I can play some more of this...Halo?

WOLVERINE: Sure.



MOLE MAN: Well, okay.  But in order to understand, you must know, it's not just about Doom.  No, no.  You have to go back a lot longer than that...