ON TOP OF THE HULKS' APARTMENT BUILDING, THE SPECIAL SECRET MUTANT TEAM, X-FORCE, PREPARES TO INFILTRATE...
WOLVERINE: Cyclops is right, we can't have the Avengers totally showing us up like that!
PSYLOCKE: For sure. We've can't afford to screw this up. I've been focusing my psionic powers on the Hulks' apartment, but there is so much interference and all I can pick up is signals of extreme violence!
WOLVERINE: Extreme violence is our our specialty. Wade, you go in first and check things out; the rest of us will follow.
DEADPOOL: Okay, sure. You're sending me into the Hulks' apartment to meet up with Mole Man. Now...just so I'm clear, who exactly is the bad guy?
WOLVERINE: Mole Man's bad guy numero uno, but watch out for Red Hulk because he can be quite a bastard, too.
DEADPOOL: Got it. Here I go...down, down, the goblin's down...
DEADPOOL: Fifteen birds...in five fir trees...their feathers were fanned...in a fiery breeze...gosh, from the sound of things, there's quite a slaughter going on in there.
DEADPOOL: But funny little birds...they had no wings! Oh what shall we do...with the funny little things? Dude...it's sounding pretty violent in there. Just--brutal. Hope the Hulks are okay.
DEADPOOL: Hm. Well, this is...uh...not exactly what I expected...
MOLE MAN: Oh, phooey! These Covenant are just awful!
GREY HULK: Hell yeah they are. Now, here's another one, now--X button, X button, X button!
GREY HULK: Oooh! Headshot! Nice. Now pick up his weapon.
DEADPOOL: Wow, that was a really nice headshot.
DEADPOOL: Wait...what was I here for?
WOLVERINE: Hiiiiiihheeeeaaaayyyyyyyygh!
WOLVERINE: Okay, Mole Man, you leave the Hulks alone and--uh...wait, what's going on here? What the hell, Wade?
GREY HULK: Hey, Wolverine! It's all good. We convinced Mole Man that Dr. Doom was going to double cross him so he called off the Mole Monster and we've just been chillaxin'. Teaching him how to play Halo.
MOLE MAN: Oooh, I can never pick up those frag grenades...
LATER...
WOLVERINE: Look, Mole Man, you're not in any trouble, but we need to know what Doom's up to. Tell us everything you know.
MOLE MAN: Then I can play some more of this...Halo?
WOLVERINE: Sure.
MOLE MAN: Well, okay. But in order to understand, you must know, it's not just about Doom. No, no. You have to go back a lot longer than that...
TO BE CONTINUED IN CHAPTER 19: THE BALLAD OF EN SABAH NUR AND NATHANIEL ESSEX!!!
Um, Duh! Halo's not on PS3. Mole Man wouldn't be pushing the X button, it would be the A button.
ReplyDeleteAnd why does Psylocke get all the female screentime? I'm way cooler than she is...
Huh? XBox controllers totally have X buttons! (XYAB)
ReplyDeleteBut who am I kidding. I'm just glad somebody--and somebody who knows a little about a little--besides my little brother is reading this.
And if they only made a Domino figure (or if I were only able to adequately customize one), Psylocke wouldn't hog all the screen time...because Domino is super bad ass.
I love Grey Hulk telling hiim what to do next.
ReplyDelete